Late night thoughts

Hello dear internet reader,

I was thinking that maybe I should start blogging a little more regularly. Do escuse any spelling mistakes in this post. I am on a strange computer, and I can barely find anything on this keyboard. It's also two AM and I'm tired.

So. Yes. A blog-post. What would you like to hear about? I don't belive anything interesting has happened since my last post, but what else can I do at two AM, but to entertain you guys?

First off, the bad news.
As I might have written on this blog (and everywhere else) my friends and I were planning a Yoad-trip next summer. It was supposed to take us from Canada, all the way down to Disneyland (or world, or place, of whatevs. I'm tired) and then back again. To say that I was excited about this would be an encredible understatement, since there is probably no word to describe how much I was looking forward to this.
Now, however, my joy is gone.

I am not a rich girl. It's not as if I am poor. I have food, clothers, a very nice home and I can go to the movies, eat out, when I would like too, but I am not rich. Vacations are saved for, and cannot be spurr of the moment things. (the london trip I am taking, might seem like a spurr of the moment thing, but I have planned this for months, and will pay lots of it myself)
But, I do not have a pile of money I can use whenever I want, like dear Harry P does.

So my trip will probably not happen. This is sad. This is so sad, I had a huge fight with my mom about it. Tears and harsh words were involved, and I regret most of what I said. That isn't the only reason to why I can't go, though. Even if we had that kind of money, mom wouldn't let me go all on my own.

I'm sixteen. My world consists of school, books, friends and ... this is where I want to say boys, but sadly no luck there yet.
My mom, they dear person that she is, is refusing to let me go on a raod-trip by myself. I had to badger her for months about a weekend in London, imagine what a month in the states would make her say.
Even though I will only be two or three months away from 18 next summer, she believes that I am too young.

I admit that riding across America is not the safest way to spend a summer. "What happens if you run out of gas in the middle of nowhere? What happens if you get lost in the middle of nowhere? Can you IMAGINE what places you could end up on?" (think Psycho) "Do you KNOW what is OUT THERE?"

Maybe I don't. Maybe I never will.

But, what is life about, but not taking chances? What is life without some risks? What is life without an awesome road-trip, across America?

Who knows?
I do know that Bekah and Shannon will have an awesome time without me (I will probably be at home, crying my eyes out I am afraid)
Mom is telling me that this isn't the only chance I have of doing this, there will be other times, and I am sure there will be. But when? When will I ever have time to spend a summer with my awesome girls?

A weekend with Shannon and Lucy is not going to be enough. I would like to have some more. If I could, I would take eternity, even though we would probably tire of each other after a while. ^^,

So, yeah. I'm upset. And sad. I really wanted this. I suppose I was so excited I never really thought about mom's protests. They weren't as loud as my squels of excitement.
But that is life, I guess. You want things, and then you're disappointed. So crap. Shit. Bloody bananas.

I should be glad that I am goingt to London in barely two weeks, which I am, but this whole road-trip thing has taken most of my excitement. Also, traveling alone is scary. At least they speak English, so I will be able to communiate if I get lost in the airport. (it could, and probably will happen)
A weekend will NOT be enough with Lucy and Shannon, but if it is all that I can have, then I shall grasp on to it with my few fingers and not let go.

I should sleep now. This wasn't supposed to be a long blogpost. It wasnt't really supposed to be anything, but I have been writing for almost an hour now, and I guess it's time to turn in.

Tomorrow I will be heading into the city to attend a little Nerdfighter gathering. It will probably be awesome, even though I hate meeting new people. The shy girl inside of me, seems to be the dominant one. It will be great seeing CH, though, especially since she is leaving for Canada soon, and won't be back until next summer.
I am trying to convince this girl to come with me, first of all because I miss her and would like to see her. The fact that iwill know someone is just a bonus.

Now I feel this lovely bed that I am sitting on calling my name. If I should actually sleep or try to write something on my novel now that I am on a role is hard to decide. What do you say, dear internet-readers? Sleep or write?

Love and bananas,
Sarah